Odds are


Life is a gamble. My life is never a sure bet.

Although I’m officially unaware of the betting pools on various aspects of my life, I would like to give those wagering sizeable chunks of money a fighting chance. These odds are provided for entertainment purposes only, yet no entertainment is guaranteed as a result.

Place your bets.

oddsboard.jpgThat I’ll adopt a dog within a year: 10:1.

That I’ll adopt a cat ever: 2:1 (counting adoption by marriage).

That I’ll spill my drink: 7:2.

That I’ll forget the punchline or blurt it out too soon: 5:2.

That I’ll wear something black: 3:2.

That I’ll pretend to know your name: 5:1.

That I’ll pick up the check: 3:1.

That I’ll Google you: 7:1.

That I’ll let your car into my lane: 3:2.

That I’ll return your call: 5:3.

That I’ll return your e-mail: 7:2.

That I’ll bet on your miserable life: 2:1.

That I’ll surf the Web while talking to you on the phone: 10:1.

That I’ll defer to your pick for restaurant: 4:3.

That I’ll defer to your pick for movie: 11:1.

That I’ll ask for a receipt: 1:5.

That I’ll have more than two drinks: 30:1.

That I’ll use “work” as an excuse to get out of something: 5:2.

That I’ll have a pen on me: 1:2.

That I’ll be looking straight at you and not listening: 8:1.

That I’ll be late: 1:1.

That I’ll be really late: 3:1.

That I’ll misplace a book/CD/DVD borrowed from a friend: 1:10.

That I’ll put off chores for entertaining distractions: 1:2.

That I’ll fix your computer glitch: 1:3.

That I’ll “bring it”: 7:1.

That I’ll have cereal for dinner: 15:1.

That I’ll have salad: 2:1.

That I’ll get sick: 200:1.

That I’ll laugh at your joke: 20:1.

That I’ll tip correctly: 1:10.

That I’ll wear glasses: 1:2.

That I’ll have a backup plan: 3:1.

That I’ll use the backup plan: 7:1.

That I’ll care: 11:1.


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